Logically I know I might need help.

I've been called a failure by my own parent. Blamed for the failings of the financial situation with the company.

I can feel the countdown timer ticking down to the end of my opportunities to leave and start a fresh.

I'm tired but apparently I shouldn't feel tired. I'm stressed and developing serious GI issues but I apparently shouldn't.

I should be calm, but passionate; I should be kind but firm and understanding and tolerant to abuse and resilient.

I don't think I can.

Logically I know I shouldn't take it all on myself. I know it's not on me that I'm being used as an outlet for someone else's issues.

But I'm tired. I'm stressed. I'm close to breaking. I know I am.

I think I need help. But I don't know how to get any.

I shouldn't think of how easy it would be to crash a car. I shouldn't feel tempted to just press down on the accelerator. I know this.

But at this point, I'm just so tired of everything.

The longer I'm here, the more awful I feel.