Mine pup doth looketh like nice fluff,
But the cute belies the evil truth
for beneath the curtain of her ruff
the rascal makes the loving moot.

'Tis sad, 'tis true!
Mine pup is oh demon eyed;
She sleeps like yon dove
but grins as she destroys.

.....

Ah, I'm crazed. And part of the whole shit is placed solely upon my pup's wee, furry shoulders--the little rat!

I swear, sometimes when I look at her, I can hear sweet Elvis serenading my situation. His mocking tune runs amok and I can do nothing but clench my fists as I hear the words so clearly...

You look like an angel
Walk like an angel
Talk like an angel
But I got wise
You're the devil in disguise
Oh yes you are
The devil in disguise

Ah... 'tis great misfortune hath I to stumble upon the muted humour of fate!